Moving abroad for love? 5 things to consider before taking a decision
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Moving to a new country is exciting. It's a chance to start fresh, make new friends and try new things. But what happens when you move abroad for love?
In this guide, I'll share my own experience of moving abroad for love and 5 key things to consider before taking your decision.
It´s NOT FOR EVERYONE
You need to be able to adapt to a new culture and accept that there will always be differences between the customs, values and beliefs of your partner's country versus what you are used to at home.
For many people moving abroad is scary because it means leaving familiar comforts behind: friends and family nearby; your job; being able to speak the language fluently without having an accent.
2. DON’T FALL INTO THE CO-DEPENDENCY TRAP
When you’re in love, it can be easy to lose yourself in your partner. You may find yourself doing things that don’t feel like they reflect who you are and that make no sense in your life outside of this relationship. But don’t do it! Be true to yourself and remember who you are.
Actually, to build a healthy relationship, especially abroad, I think it's very important to have a strong sense of self.
Finding your purpose outside of the relationship is key. For some people, it might be finding their dream job abroad, while for others it could be developing a new passion or raising a family.
Whatever it is, just make sure to find that thing that makes you happy.
3. Build a strong network, make your own friends
Building a strong network of friends is essential if you are going to live abroad. It’s not just a great way to make new friends and have fun, but it can also be an invaluable source of support during your time abroad.
Your social life will be important for a number of reasons:
You need people who share your interests or at least understand why you are doing what you are doing. You don't want to spend all your time with people who think it's weird that you moved abroad for love!
They can be part of the support group that checks in on how things are going from time to time, gives advice when needed, etc.
You can meet up with them whenever possible and have fun together so there is always something exciting happening!
4. DON’T LOSE YOURSELF, TO LOVE SOMEONE
It’s important to maintain your own identity. You can still love someone, but that doesn’t mean you have to lose yourself. You are still an individual with your own interests, friendships and hobbies. So don’t let yourself be erased by love.
Find your way back into a relationship with yourself through the things that make you feel good about yourself again; the people who want to see you happy; the things that make you feel relaxed and nourished. And then share these experiences with your partner in order to connect on an even deeper level—as opposed to feeling like they have taken over everything in your life!
5. REMEMBER, YOU’RE NOT DOING IT FOR HIM/HER, YOU ARE DOING IT FOR YOURSELF
Remember, you are doing it for yourself.
You are doing it for your future.
You are doing it for your happiness.
You are doing it because you want to and not because someone else wants you to do something they think is better than what you were already happy with or had set up in your life at a particular time of your choosing (before meeting them).
MY TAKEAWAYS
In the end, I decided to go for it. I'm so glad that I did. There’s no doubt that moving abroad was one of the best decisions I ever made. And while it wasn't always easy or fun, there’s something about being thousands of miles away from home with someone you love that feels so special.
In an ideal world (the one where we all have unlimited budgets), we would all be able to sustain our current lifestyles when we move abroad for love without sacrificing anything at all in terms of career or social life—but as any expat knows, this isn't always how things work out most of the time.
That's why it's important that before you commit yourself to moving abroad for love, you're honest with yourself about what kind of sacrifices are involved and whether they're worth making in order to pursue your relationship overseas...and then make sure those sacrifices are ones you actually want!
Moving abroad for love is something that many people do, but it’s also something that can go wrong if you don’t know what you’re doing.
If you are thinking about taking the plunge yourself, remember these tips: Don’t fall into a co-dependency trap; build your own network of friends; and don’t lose yourself to love someone else!
