Feeling embarrassed when speaking a foreign language? You need to hear this!

First, allow me to re-introduce myself. I am Laetitia, a native French-speaker, who blogs in English and is currently learning a third language (Spanish) in her second language (English). Sounds like something straight out of the Matrix, right?

So with this short intro, I hope this makes me a little bit more legit to talk to you about overcoming your fear of speaking another language. 

Now, although my Spanish is ok, I still freak out from time to time when I have to speak in Spanish, especially at work. By the way, if you haven’t read it, I also wrote this article on how to overcome imposter syndrome when working abroad. Like many people who’ve been learning a new language for a while, I am usually pretty comfortable with small talks and day to day conversations. It usually gets ugly when I am out of my comfort zone, for example when I’ve to speak in front of many people. 

But, despite my fear, my mind going blank, my words getting mixed up, my accent sounding ever so French, I always give it a go. It might not sound perfect, but as long as I get my point across I am happy.

Now we’re all different, but in my case, after more than 11 years living abroad, first in the UK and now in Spain, here are some of the golden rules that have been helping me overcome my fear of speaking in a new foreign language. 

Stop giving a sh** about what people think.

As humans, we’ve got a tendency to judge others. We all do it, whether we like it or not. Knowing this, it’s up to us to decide who’s judgment matters to us. Back in the day, when I used to work in Pret a Manger in London, among many slang I hadn’t learned yet was the word “fiver” AKA a five-pound note. 

This was like 8 years ago, but I’ll always remember that feeling. This guy kept asking me for a “fiver” despite me clearly not understanding what he was on about. I could see in his eyes how stupid he thought I was for not understanding him. It took my colleague’s intervention to put an end to my nightmare and explain to me what a “fiver” meant. 

I could go on and on about similar horror stories of encountered with people like this guy. But why would I? Who really cares about what these people think. People will judge you no matter what you do, but here’s the thing, if you let people´s judgment get in the way of your learning this will significantly slow down your progress.

I know it´s not easy but learning to ignore people´s judgment is the number one thing that will set you free from feeling embarrassed or ashamed when speaking in a new language. By the way, I definitely recommend the book The Subtle Art of Not Giving a S*** by Mark Manson for more on this, as not giving a s*** can be applied to many more aspects of our lives.

Forget about perfectionism.

“Better done than perfect” is a concept that I really like especially when it comes to speaking a foreign language. As adults, we are conditioned to not want to make mistakes. Society seems to always reward people who get it “right” when actually getting it wrong is a form of progress.

Getting rid of perfectionism is the best thing anyone can do when learning a new language. We all have to accept that we’ll be making mistakes. Unless you make mistakes you’ll never learn. Most of the things I’ve learned to say correctly were because I once said them wrong and someone took the time to correct me. 

So don’t see mistakes or errors as something bad but rather a way to get you closer to your goal. So keep on making them, and learn from them.

Fake it until you make it.

This is something that’s come in very handy in the past few years. I am someone who loves languages, and when it comes to learning new words or expressions I am pretty much like a parrot. I love listening to Spanish-speakers and copy their expressions or learning new colloquialism. After a few hours of watching Spanish movies on Netflix, next thing you know, I’ll be swearing as if I was straight out of an Almodóvar movie. 

To me, that’s the best way to learn. Pick up new sentences or expressions and put them into practice as soon as you can. The beauty of learning a new language is not just to master the grammar perfectly. Picking up new expressions and colloquialism can help you feel closer to the country’s culture and sound more fluent too. So don’t be scared to go overboard and have fun!

If someone makes fun of you for trying, show them the door.

Now, this is an important one. Surrounding yourself with people in the same mind frame as you is key when learning a new language. Call me petty, but I won’t have anyone around me who’s making me feel stupid for making mistakes. If someone wants to correct me that’s fair, but the last thing anyone needs when learning a new language is to be made to feel small or silly. 

Remember this: Roughly half the world speaks only one language! 

I once read that roughly half the world speaks only one language, and the other half speaks two or more. How cool is it to be part of the 50% of the world population that speaks more than one language? Sometimes you have got to learn how to blow your own whistle, girl!

Don’t take for granted that learning a new language isn’t for the faint-hearted, so there’s nothing to be ashamed about when speaking in a new language quite the opposite. 

Also read: Discover how to learn Spanish without taking Spanish classes.

Keep your eyes on the prize.

Last but not least, whenever I feel like giving up or like I am not progressing. Or when I actually thought I was progressing, then have a conversation with someone and end up making no sense at all. I remind myself of all the small wins I had along the way. The first time I dared saying my first sentence in Spanish to a stranger. The first time I watched a movie in a foreign language and understood everything. The first time I made a joke in a foreign. language *and people laugh*. The first time I dreamt in a new language. 

All of these remind me why learning a new language is one of the most rewarding feelings ever. So every time you are about to speak in a foreign language and are feeling embarrassed I hope you remember these things too. 

If you made it until the end of this article, and want to share some more tips about how you have overcome your fear of speaking in a foreign language, leave it in the comments below.